Practice
ASD-STE100 Examples: Before and After
Last reviewed: · Based on ASD-STE100 Issue 9
All examples are our own. They show STE principles. They are not taken from the official ASD-STE100 specification. Check the official specification for the full rules.
Procedures
Procedures tell the reader what to do. STE procedures use commands, one instruction in each sentence, and the steps in the correct order.
Before
The technician should then proceed to carefully remove the access panel by unscrewing the four fasteners.
After
Remove the four screws. Carefully remove the access panel.
Why it is clearer: The sentence is now two direct commands in the correct order. "Should" and "proceed to" are removed. The reader does not have to find the instruction inside the sentence.
Before
Make sure that the pump is switched off and the pressure gauge reads zero before the hose is disconnected.
After
Stop the pump. Make sure that the pressure gauge shows zero. Disconnect the hose.
Why it is clearer: The steps are now in the order the reader does them. Each step is one sentence. The passive "is disconnected" is now a command.
Before
Prior to installation, the seal must be lubricated with a thin film of grease.
After
Before you install the seal, apply a thin layer of grease to it.
Why it is clearer: "Prior to" becomes "before". The passive "must be lubricated" becomes a command.
Before
Upon completion of the test, the equipment is to be returned to its original configuration.
After
When the test is complete, put all switches back to their initial positions.
Why it is clearer: "Upon completion of" is replaced with a simple condition. "Original configuration" is vague. The new sentence says exactly what to do.
Descriptions
Descriptive text gives information. STE descriptions use short sentences with one topic each, and the most important information first.
Before
The hydraulic accumulator, which is located in the aft section of the bay and which is pressurized by nitrogen, serves to dampen pressure fluctuations within the system.
After
The hydraulic accumulator is in the aft section of the bay. Nitrogen pressurizes the accumulator. The accumulator decreases pressure changes in the system.
Why it is clearer: One long sentence with two "which" clauses becomes three short sentences. Each sentence gives one fact.
Before
Should the sensor fail, a fault message will be generated by the control unit and displayed to the operator.
After
If the sensor fails, the control unit shows a fault message on the display.
Why it is clearer: "Should the sensor fail" is an inverted condition that many readers do not know. "If" is clear. The passive voice is removed.
Before
The filter is utilized for the purpose of preventing the contamination of the fuel.
After
The filter prevents contamination of the fuel.
Why it is clearer: "Is utilized for the purpose of" adds five words and no information. The new sentence says the same thing directly.
Warnings and cautions
A warning tells the reader about a risk of injury or death. A caution tells the reader about a risk of damage to equipment. STE warnings and cautions start with a clear command and then give the risk.
Before
WARNING: It is extremely important to be aware of the fact that high voltage may be present at the terminals even after the unit has been switched off.
After
WARNING: Disconnect the power supply before you touch the terminals. The terminals can have high voltage after you set the unit switch to OFF. High voltage can cause death or injury.
Why it is clearer: The original only says "be aware". The new warning starts with a command, then gives the risk and the result.
Before
CAUTION: Care should be taken not to overtighten the bolts, as this could result in damage to the threads.
After
CAUTION: Do not tighten the bolts to more than 25 N·m. If you tighten the bolts too much, you can cause damage to the threads.
Why it is clearer: "Care should be taken" does not tell the reader what to do. The new caution gives a clear limit and the result if the reader ignores it. (The torque value is an example.)
Before
Avoid prolonged skin contact with the cleaning agent.
After
WARNING: Wear protective gloves when you use the cleaning agent. The cleaning agent can cause injury to your skin.
Why it is clearer: "Avoid prolonged contact" is vague. How long is "prolonged"? The new text gives a clear action and the risk.
Passive vs active voice
In the passive voice, the reader does not always know who does the action. STE uses the active voice in procedures, and as much as possible in descriptions.
Before
The valve is opened by the operator.
After
Description: The operator opens the valve. Procedure: Open the valve.
Why it is clearer: The active sentence says who does the action. In a procedure, the reader is the person who does it, so a command is best.
Before
The results should be recorded in the logbook.
After
Record the results in the logbook.
Why it is clearer: The passive sentence with "should" does not say who records the results, or if it is necessary. The command is clear.
Before
It is recommended that the battery be charged every 30 days.
After
Charge the battery every 30 days.
Why it is clearer: "It is recommended that" makes the step sound optional. If the step is necessary, write it as a command.
Long sentences
STE limits procedural sentences to 20 words and descriptive sentences to 25 words. Long sentences are harder to read and to translate.
Before (42 words)
If the indicator light does not come on after the reset button has been pressed and held for at least five seconds, check that the circuit breaker is closed and that the connector on the rear of the unit is fully engaged.
After
Push and hold the reset button for 5 seconds. If the indicator light does not come on, do these steps: (1) Make sure that the circuit breaker is closed. (2) Make sure that the connector on the rear of the unit is fully engaged.
Why it is clearer: One 42-word sentence becomes short steps. "Push and hold" stays in one sentence because the actions occur at the same time.
Before (39 words)
The cooling system, which consists of a radiator, a pump, two thermostats and a header tank, keeps the engine temperature within the specified limits by circulating coolant through the engine block and the radiator whenever the engine is running.
After
The cooling system has a radiator, a pump, two thermostats and a header tank. When the engine operates, the pump moves coolant through the engine block and the radiator. This keeps the engine temperature in the specified limits.
Why it is clearer: The new text has three sentences. The first says what the system has. The second says what it does. The third says why.
Before (37 words)
In order to save your changes, you will need to click on the Save button, which is located in the top right-hand corner of the screen, and then wait until the confirmation message has been displayed.
After
To save your changes, click Save in the top-right corner. Wait for the confirmation message.
Why it is clearer: This is software documentation. The same STE principles apply: short commands, no "you will need to", no passive voice.
Complex vocabulary
STE uses simple, common words with one meaning. A specific word is better than a general word.
Before
Utilize the appropriate tool to facilitate the removal of the bearing.
After
Use the bearing puller to remove the bearing.
Why it is clearer: "Utilize", "appropriate" and "facilitate" are vague and formal. The new sentence names the tool and gives a direct action.
Before
Ascertain whether there is any evidence of corrosion on the bracket.
After
Examine the bracket for corrosion.
Why it is clearer: "Ascertain whether there is any evidence of" is seven words for one action.
Before
Terminate the operation of the compressor immediately in the event of abnormal noise.
After
If you hear an unusual noise, stop the compressor immediately.
Why it is clearer: The condition comes first, so the reader knows when to act. "Terminate the operation of" becomes "stop".
Noun clusters
A noun cluster is a group of nouns in a row. Long clusters are hard to understand, because the reader must find which noun is the main one. STE recommends no more than three words in a noun cluster.
Before
Check the engine oil pressure warning light test switch.
After
Check the test switch for the engine oil pressure warning light.
Why it is clearer: The main noun ("test switch") is now first. A preposition shows the relation. If "engine oil pressure warning light" is a technical name in your documents, explain it once and then use it consistently.
Before
Replace the main landing gear door actuator hydraulic line seal.
After
Replace the seal on the hydraulic line of the door actuator. The door actuator is on the main landing gear.
Why it is clearer: A seven-word cluster becomes a clear phrase. The location goes into a separate sentence.
Before
Do the fuel system pressure relief valve inspection.
After
Examine the pressure relief valve in the fuel system.
Why it is clearer: The action ("inspection") was hidden in a noun at the end. Now it is the verb at the start.
Software documentation
STE principles also work for user guides, help texts and release notes.
Before
In order to proceed with the configuration of your account settings, navigate to the Preferences section.
After
To change your account settings, go to Preferences.
Why it is clearer: Long verbs ("proceed with the configuration of") become one simple verb.
Before
Once the file has been successfully uploaded, a confirmation message will be displayed to the user.
After
When the upload is complete, the system shows a confirmation message.
Why it is clearer: The future passive becomes the simple present with a clear subject.
Before
Hit the button to kick off the sync process.
After
Click Sync to start the synchronization.
Why it is clearer: Idioms ("hit", "kick off") are hard for non-native readers. Use the exact label of the button.
Before
The API will return an error if the token is not valid or has expired, and you will need to obtain a new one.
After
If the token is not valid or is expired, the API returns an error. Get a new token.
Why it is clearer: One long sentence becomes a description and a separate command.
Try your own text
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